Ive not gone for sunday service for such a long time. Its been 2 - 3 months… i stopped going for sunday service. I only attend the youth meet on sunday afternoons. Today, was a special day. Somehow i got the excuse to go to morning services. And today, I had an encounter with GOD.

Todays service was also a bit more special than the usual services. Today, there was a special prayer for all SPM and STPM exam candidates. We were supposed to call our frens, christians and non christians…

As the whole church was praying for the exam candidates… i felt a strong pressence of the HOLY SPIRIT speaking to me. The was one lady (a prophet) whom was praying for the exam candidates, and she said to them,

" God gave Daniel wisdom, Daniel was even put into the lions den, wat is SPM and STPM compared with it. "  " The LORD says, do not worry, The GOD of Daniel is with you ".

God was speaking to me. Although the lady said it to the exam candidates, i felt a strong conviction in my heart tat the Holy Spirit was ministering to me. I went into tears as the Spirit of GOD was speaking to me.

God has been telling me throughout the whole year, do not worry, because He is with me. He will grant me wisdom which ive always asked for. He will be with me through the darkest hours. It is a promise He gave me.

At the end of this year, I will be put to a big test of confronting my parents about me going to church. Yes i am afraid. I am afraid, about being stripped off my current lifestyle and priviledges. I am afraid of the chairs and tables flying around in the house. I am afraid of being kicked out of the house.

But wat means more to me, is pleasing my GOD. I will always remember those bad times. God took all those moments away. Now its time for me to show how grateful i am to HIM. By making a stand at home. I believe that as i have been praying for a breakthrough in my family, the breakthrough is finally here. And GOD cant move unless i exercise my faith in HIM.

Meanwhile i will be preparing myself spiritually and seek HIM first. God is awesome. I dun wan to miss any of this action. Praise the GOD of Daniel.

Hallelujah !!! Amen !!!

backslider to FRONTLINER pt 1
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 2
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 3
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 4
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 5
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 6
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 7
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 8
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 9

backslider to FRONTLINER pt 10
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 11

When ITB was caught by the education ministry for offering illegal programmes, i was happy. I knew GOD was going to bring me to a new land. However, things didnt seem to work the way i planned. At first i thought i could get out of my house, and go to another place to study. But my dad has said before… if u still wanna study… u must stay in this house. That leaves me no choice.. but penang. Aaarrggghhh !!!

So, the only place left to go was PSDC. At tat time, i was still hoping to go to IPOH. So i sent an email to Linton College, Ipoh. At the same time i went to PSDC and asked bout my course. Sad to say, i couldnt get full exemptions for the course i hav studied. At tat time PSDC only offers Mechatronics. They dun offer mechanical engineering. I’ll get my exemptions for the subjects ive studied, but then, as i calculated, i can only graduate in 5 years time with a degree in engineering.

It was new years eve. I called my best fren Chong Wee tat night to wish him happy new year. We ended up talking about my study route. Chong Wee suggested to me… hey… y dun u consider accounting as a career? Since u have to start all from afresh, 5 more years of study in engineering, might as well… consider changing course. Immediately i rebuked him and said… NO WAY.. me and accounting… dont clique. But he tempted me further… he said.. if u do well.. u can finish it in 3 years time… and end up with a professional qualification which is higher than a degree. Hmm.. at tat time… i didnt hav any thing in mind.. except.. i wanted to leave home as fast as possible. I dun wan to stay at home anymore. I hated my enviroment at home.

It was a big decision i had to make… to switch from science to commerce. Many ppl was quite sad about it when i asked their opinion. Cos all of them knew… i loved science to my bones. Some kind of dream i had.. keke.. It was never meant to be mine. Freedom was more important to me at tat time.

I prayed tat night… asking GOD for guidance. Is this where i shud go? that day was the last day of registration. I told GOD… if it is ur plan, then, i will register it b4 the registration ends. If its not ur plan… then stop me from registering the programme. My dad was pissed with me that very day. He almost stopped me from registering. Yet.. he allowed me to register. So finally, i landed in IPG studying CAT ( the pre-U programme for ACCA). At the first day of my class, Linton college finally gave me a call. I turned them the offer. If they had called earlier, i would have gone there. Looks like GOD wants me to remain in Penang.

WAS IT THE RIGHT DECISION?
I was very childish back then. All this happened at the end of 2002. I never had a direction in my life. Ive always wanted to start life all over again. Yet, it never happened. The struggles and hard times… kept coming one after another. Going to IPG… didnt make my life better. It got worse. I never had peace in me. There was always insecurity in me. I suffered a lot of mental torture during this period. My hatred towards my father increased exponentially. Ill tell u more in my next episode.This was my wilderness period.

However, if ppl ask me now, are u sure u made the right decision? I can assure u… YES I DID. I may not hav chosen the right career for myself… but ive made the right step. Im not looking for a career. Im looking for a platform to impact lifes.

Many ppl say tat i dun look like an accountant. Yea… i dun look like one. But i know, this is the qualification tat suits me the most. I dun think ill end up as an accountant, yet… the qualification will open a big world of oppurtunities ahead of me. I will use it in the future to impact more lifes for JESUS when the time comes.

Looking back at where i am now, i can only thank GOD for guiding me this far. It has been prophecised to me that watever im studying now will be used to serve GOD. Although i cant see how it can happen… yet i have the faith, that GOD will guide me thru it all. Im begining to see the signs of all this happening. Praise GOD for everything.

to be continued…

backslider to FRONTLINER pt 1
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 2
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 3
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 4
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 5
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 6
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 7
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 8
backslider to FRONTLINER pt 9

During those times, when ITB was shutting down, those were the times, when u c peoples true colors.

I never liked tat tauke’s wife for some good reason, shes a hypocrite. When everything was fine, she was praising me all the way. Promoting me in every sense. Even wanted me to be her son-in-law. But when students started leaving the institute, she talked bad about me behind my back.

She started condemning me and cursing my decision to leave the institute. She started saying tat i was a bad student and failed badly in my INTI days. She did even say i was a bad student whom always tuang classes. There were many more things that she hurled at me. And the WORST of all was, she took my personal details tat the institute kept and showed it to all the students to embarass me. That includes my certificates and result slips from INTI college days. I thought those information is supposed to be private and confidential? Well… I hated her for tat. I really hated her so much…

I was lucky to hear all this from all my ah beng frens. They too were pissed with her. Cos she didnt know i was their tai lo(Big Brother).. keke

After tat incident, all those ah bengs… left the institute and continued their life elsewhere. As for me… i made a big decision of my life… to switch course from engineering to accounting. Even then, when the tauke’s wife found out from brother K tat i went to study accounting, she condemned my decision and saying i wouldnt make it. Well… I really hate tat women.

After almost a year later after all these events, she did try to be nice to me. While i was in college, she came to my house and gave me mangoes and australian candies. I wasnt around then, it was my maid who got it from her. Thank GOD she didnt pass it to me, or … i might have done some uncivilised act.

When i found out it was her, i immediately told my parents bout it. I made a strong statement to them that i hate this lady. I called them to throw away all those gifts. I raised my voice saying tat she embarassed me in public, and tat is unforgivable. I was daring to do that at tat moment, which i usually dunt( cos im very scared of my father… keke).

Actually the purpose behind me telling my parents is to let them know, that they too make mistakes. I want them to know, this is their mistake tat i have to face such insulting times. Sometimes if u dun tell them, they would think as though, its just another story.

Tat night itself, i was down, cos i was reminded bout my past. I called my GOD-Sis immediately. She consoled me that night.. kekeke.. thanx yoko. My dad finally came to talk to me tat night, and told me… well.. just be civilised. Dun be rude or shout at her… cos tats wat we call kurang ajar. I can see from his face, he too was dissappointed, but i feel, his advise is correct. I listened to it.

When the tauke’s wife called, i answered her the civilised way, politely. But i didnt show extra interest in her conversations. It was more like her talking to a robot. She ask me 1 question, i answer 1 question. Nothing else. Then when she finally put down her phone… that the last ever time i heard anything bout her. Yes.. stay tat way.. get out of my life.

I finally forgiven this women.

I didnt want to forgive this person last time. But finally, i forgiven her. It was the down point for me . Yet i believe that that was the wilderness GOD put me to the test. Throughout my life, ive got insulted all the time, and battled over it. This was just one of them. I guess, some of us have to go thru this.

Today as i looked back, i can confidently say, i can go thru all kinds of insults people hurl at me. Cos im used to it.

The answer to all this… is knowing who is in control of ur life… As for me… It is Jesus Christ. I find my identity in HIM. Jesus by Himself was insulted even more than this. And He overcomed it all. Everytime i face this, I pray hard… expressing all my dissappointments to my creator and HE comforted me thru it all. I had all the reasons to hate her… yet… The Spirit of GOD kept telling me… FORGIVE HER… In the end.. i forgiven her.

The reason i forgave her was because GOD… is FORGIVING. God has forgiven me… so i too should forgive others. Bible teaches us… to live a testimony before GOD… and leave the battle into the LORDs hands. True enough… i heard… the taukes wife got into further problems later on. Never try to hurt God’s children. HIS eyes is always watching. I didnt need to do anything. But truly deep inside my heart… i have forgiven her. If she repented… and turned to GOD… i believe, that will be a great testimony.

As a future missionary, i believe GOD is training me to be tough… mentally and not to take insults so seriously. This is just part of HIS plans of building me up.

To be continued…

This years birthday is GREAT and meaningful for me. How did i celebrated my birthday? well not the usual way…

Wat i did was simple. I gave myself a treat. Doing wat i love most. I ponteng all my classes that day (kids dun try this at home). First thing i did the whole day was, to go online (MSN messenger). Chatted with a few fellows. Had nice chats. Then later went for lunch with churchmates.

Went to Gurney Plaza
After that, I went to Gurney Plaza(shopping complex) and lepak there alone. Praise GOD, MPH is finally open, cos theres my favourite lepak spot (its been closed for renovation). I met with a few unexpected ppl in Gurney Plaza. Then terus went to MPH.

Suddenly while i was in MPH, my stomach started growling. I needed to go to the toilet. However… i dun bring tissues. So i have to buy my own. Went to the whole Gurney Plaza, but couldnt find 1. I finally found tissues in Watsons but then, i was too stingy to buy the whole bulk of tissues. So i suffered with it while walking.

Thank GOD, terserampak with a bunch of frens who came to the rescue and gave me 1 pack of tissues. I rushed immediately to do my business.

Lepak in MPH
After tat, i went back to my lepak spot, MPH. Spent at least 1 1/2 hours in the bookstore checking some good books alone ( not everyone likes to go to the bookstore.. kekeke). Finally i saw the book ive always wanted to buy, Romance of the 3 kingdoms. Bought the whole set of 4 books. Im gonna read them after my exams are over. Ive always got this special interest in chinese history and eastern philosophy. Perhaps, it my upbringing and exposure to it. Although im english educated, im very much eastern in my thinking..

Playing FLOORBALL
After that, i went straight to Dalat school for the PFA (Penang Floorball Association) training. When i told ppl i just play floorball to celebrate my birthday, ppl were like.. aiyo kesian, how come no one celebrate it with u. My answer is, this is one of the coolest birthdays i ever had. DOING SOMETHING YOURE PASSIONATE ABOUT. Its something ive always wanted to do. I really enjoyed the training. Playing along side some of the best players in the whole country. Challenging myself. Thats the thrill.

I was the earliest in Dalat. No one was there yet. I said a simple prayer unto GOD and told HIm, all i want is to enjoy myself today. Just let me enjoy FLOORBALL. And i certainly did. There was no trace of intimidation in my mind. No fear. I experienced wat psychologist call FLOW. I was relaxed. And i felt like i was able to dance with the ball using my stick. What others said, didnt bother me. It was a harmony of body and mind… Paradise.

Overview
This years birthday, made me realised many things. I am old now.. keke.. more matured.. yet immatured. My circle of friends have changed. I realised this when i see the sms i received. Ppl whom i dun expect to remember, just pop up and wish me happy birthday. Thanx fellows… ure the best.

Things around me has changed. Ive been attending RGBC for more than a year liao. Its the first year in my lifetime ive attended church every week without fail for more than 52 weeks. 1 year has passed. I have finally found my calling and passion. Most important of all, i turned back to JESUS after wandering in the world alone.

And thanks to HIM, i got back my confidence in myself after suffering from low self esteem. My favourite question last time was.. who am I?

Now i am able to say to myself, i am ready for the challenges ahead. I aint no cry baby no more. Old has passed the new has to come. I have a destiny. And I shall fulfill.

Jesus said, whoever who drinks the water i give, shall thirst no more. Yes… i thirst no more. I lack nothing. Christ has done everything on the cross for me. I dun worry about my future anymore. It seems deem even now. Yet, even with that deem light.. GOD can turn it to shake the world. I have faith in God that if i follow HIM, i will prosper.

everythings changed.. only 1 thing didnt change. hehehe.. im still single and available.. after 23 years.. hahaha… GOD will provide the ultimate 1. I need not worry.

So im finally 23 years old.. yea… im ready to shake this world. Lets shake it together… and live up our dreams.

GOD BLESS YA ALWIZ…

" THE FUTURE IS OURS " - Penang Floorball Association.

Im very down temporarily… bcos… my team lost in the floorball league. I went home dissappointed with the lost. And it affected me a few days. I felt like a soldier defeated in battle. I felt bad that i let down my teammates in battle. Ive tried my utmost best during the game. But it wasnt good enough.

HOWEVER … after thinking over and over again… PLS LET ME DECLARE THIS… if i ever be a GREAT FLOORBALL PLAYER/COACH/MANAGER in my lifetime… IT IS BECAUSE OF THIS TEAM… THE FRONTLINERS FLOORBALL TEAM !!! Nothing can change tat fact… cos i always feel so…

This team means a lot to me. People whom are not in the team, will never ever get to taste the FRONTLINERS spirit.

I once told many ppl in the team before, I want to win the coming penang league next year, only as a FRONTLINER. I will only win it.. with this team.. no other team can substitute this team. Ive trained, sweat and fight all the battles on the court with the FRONTLINERS TEAM.

There is a strong bonding with everyone in the team. The reason i train so extremely hard, is becos… i cant let my own comrades down…  whom have always believed in me in spite of me letting them down. Ive always said this… if someone believes in me… i will fight for tat person. Thank you team…

All my life… ive never gotten into any sports team simply becos, ppl didnt trust me. I was never given a chance to show my true potential.

When i landed in this team…

Ppl here always encouraged me to go to greater levels. Those seasoned players.. even taught me their secret jutsu [secret technique.. :)] They sacrificed their time to train me up. And even gave me a crash course to prepare for the tournament. Ive only played floorball for 6 months. Yet… they given me the oppurtunity to show my true colors.

I didnt have my own stick. Yet the FRONTLINERS are so generous… to lend me their stick for my personal training (Steven… i owe u one).

I can still remember… even when it was about to rain… we still come for training together. After the rain… We wiped off the water out of the basketball court.

When the hall was flooded… we cleared the waters from the hall.

When we couldnt find a hall to book, we played together under the worst conditions in the basketball court. All those things didnt stop our progress, simply bcos…

We are more than just a floorball club… we are all brothers and sisters !!! This experience together… I will cherish it all my life.

Ive shed tears for the first time in sports… bcos this team.. is the best team ever existed on this planet… And im part of it.

Yes.. weve quarrelled.. we were frustrated with each other… we dissappointed each other… but then… those times we were together.. as a team… to me… has overcomed all this negative feelings. I love that feeling of us picking each other up after falling down. Which the world wont even care. I love this club more ever more… To me… the true glory is not just about winning anything.. it is those struggles we go together.. that makes the glory worth all the sacrifices..

Everyone… pls know this… I may lose the championship… BUT I CANNOT LOSE THIS CLUB… I will always be a FRONTLINER. Thank you for ur life… for being comrades…

Perjuangan masih belum tamat… Let us put behind all the despairs and look forward to the challenges ahead. LET US TRAIN WITH MORE PASSION and win the league next year. Know that… the days ahead will be brighter always..Do not lose hope. Let the world laugh at us… We will taste the GLORY of FLOORBALL in Penang one day.

MASCARRAR FRONTLINERS !!!